Life Beyond Death
An ongoing inquiry into purpose of death,
the nature of life after death,
how we can prepare for death,
and how we can assist the dying.
How We Can Assist the Dying
We have evolved a science of birth...but we are sadly in need of a science of death. When a child is coming into the world, we bustle about in intelligent endeavor; yet when a lifelong friend is about to leave us, we stand helplessly about, ignorant of how to aid, or worse, we bungle, and cause suffering instead of helping.
In addition to the customary care and compassion, there are several specific things we can do to assist the dying before and after death.
While the person is still living, we can play certain music or chanting that will help attune the mind to the inner planes. For example, if the person is devoutly Christian, we might play Gregorian chants or other inspirational music. From the Vedic tradition, the Vishnu Sahasranam is a special Sanskrit chant, which attunes the mind to the inner planes and helps prepare the subtle body for the stages of death. Both of these chants, as well as many other options, are available on CD's.
The period before death can be painful as the body is shutting down or being ravaged by disease. During this time, it's easy for the mind to be confused and unable to deal with issues of living. To whatever degree possible, we should take over all responsibilities so that the dying person can rest assured that everything is being handled. The last thoughts before death are important as they set the tone for everything which follows. Anything we can do to create a relaxed, comfortable and spiritually uplifting atmosphere will be of enormous benefit after death.
As soon as possible after the last breath, the body should be positioned face up, with hands folded across the lower abdomen. It's a good idea to do this within the first half hour, before rigor mortis sets in. Place a low wattage lamp or long term candle at the head of the body, about 10 inches from the crown of the head. Then the body should be left undisturbed in a quiet room for at least 48 hours, and if possible, 84 hours (3.5 days).
During this transitional period, loud noises, jarring motion or injury to the body must be avoided. If circumstances demand that the body be moved, we should have the body placed in a quiet location as soon as possible and left undisturbed for the remainder of the prescribed time. Under no circumstances should a post mortem or embalmment be preformed during this transitional period.
After death, our psychic connection with the body is not severed at once, but disintegrates gradually over 2 or 3 days. During this time, loud noise or injury can be painful and distracting. This view is supported by documented accounts given during the American Civil War, when field surgeons were amputating limbs at a furious pace. In cases where attendants disposed of severed limbs in a fire, it was observed that patients would often cry out from the burning pain.
It's important to keep in mind that the departed are not dead. The body is dead, but the awareness is still very much alive on the inner planes and sensitive to the thoughts and feelings of loved ones. If you think of them as dead, this will hold them back because they will be trying to contact you to let you know that they are not dead.
Likewise, it's important to avoid loud or overt grieving in the presence of the body. Some grieving is natural at first. But try to understand that the departed can hear, and often see, everything in the room for some time after the body is dead. If they hear weeping or emotional upset it may hold them back because they will want to console their loved ones.
Don't ask the dying person to contact you after death. Any promise like that may be felt as unfinished business, which could hold the departed to the earth plane after death. Likewise, don't try to communicate with the departed, either mentally or visually. It would be better to maintain your connection on the heart level, through love or prayer. By all means, tell them you love them; or through prayer, send your love and ask for their favorable passage. In whatever way you can, keep your love for them alive every day. That will help both of you. It will help the departed in their passage and it will help you bear the feeling of loss, because you will feel inside yourself that your love is not dead and that there is no death.
As much as possible, feel your love and see how alive and fresh it remains inside you. That is where you and the departed are together and if you can cultivate that inner connection, you will never be apart. Love is like a beam of light that will always reach your loved ones on the inner planes. They will know it is you and send love back along the same beam.
